In 1986, we said "I do".

In 2012, he could have said, “I don’t” but instead he said, “we will”.

Today we have married for 36 years, and I am so grateful.

Throughout this journey of restoration, we have been able to inspire many in their marriage journey.

When going through devastation, the easier thing to do was to give up and walk away. It takes willing hearts to stand up and fight for your marriage and family (if there are children). The daily choices of forgiveness are also not easy but doable.

When you have two people that are in 100%, I believe you can be an overcomer. When one person hurts so deeply, the hurt one needs to see major changes in the spouse that has hurt them. It is called repentance. Repentance can be a “scary” word, but what it means is the repented person changes direction in their life.

As for me, I repented and asked for forgiveness from Hank, my children, family and friends. After that the journey was between us two. A road of communication happened daily. We vowed we would keep the weeds out of the garden, so to speak. We’ve made a conscious effort of watching what we allowed into our marriage and our lives.

One very important part was our children. It was so very hard on them and still hurts my heart. As a mother, hurting the very ones you gave birth to…. unfathomable. I am so truly grateful for their forgiveness but that doesn’t mean there are not consequences.

“You choose the sin, but you cannot choose the consequence.”

We have been so blessed in the last few years and I believe this is because we decided to have God in the forefront of our marriage If we had listened to all the naysayers, we wouldn’t be here. The opinion of man is not the road to take. You do need to seek voices of love, wisdom and knowledge in this area.

Our children needed to see two parents teaching them what is looks like to forgive. This is critical in all our lives.

As for today, we celebrate!

Instead of mourning our marriage of 26 years, we are celebrating 36 years. I cannot be more grateful.

Hank is my best friend and my biggest cheerleader. He has helped me in so many ways. Were there bumps along the way? Most definitely, but we didn’t give up. That has shown that you can overcome many areas if you are willing to drive forward in faith and keep seeking knowledge.

If possible, I would say please don’t give up. Seek a trusted person with knowledge in this area.

You, too, can celebrate happy anniversaries!

To Hank, thank you. I love you and I am beyond grateful when you said, “we will”.

For husbands, this means love your wives, just as Christ loved the church. He gave up His life for her. – Ephesians 5:25